Man at Local YMCA Always Has Volume on TV Up Way Too Loud, According to Witness

0B1B9BF8-01D0-4886-BDF6-C33AE7F3DAB4.jpeg

(Opinion) A man who occasionally works out at a local YMCA always turns the television volume up way too loud, according to an eyewitness who claims she’s seen him do it on multiple occasions.  The woman, who asked that her name not be printed, said, “This guy comes in here (to the cardio room) sometimes and turns on the television, and just blasts the volume like it’s nobody’s business! It’s rude, and it really bothers me and some of the other patrons.”

While no one else we spoke to would publicly comment on the matter, some did corroborate the woman’s story, nodding yes when asked if they’d ever seen the man put the community television set on too loud.

“All the time”, shot one person while hurriedly walking past our conversation.

According to an employee at the front desk of the ‘Y’ (located in Ventura County, California, where the incidents have reportedly taken place), there are no hard and fast policies concerning the matter of television volume.  According to the rules posted on the walls in said facility, everyone is to “be respectful”, but this is somewhat subjective.

8D6DDA9D-AC24-4125-BF0D-3A5FF0BEB0C6.jpeg

“I know he’s an older gentlemen who maybe can’t hear so good anymore,” the woman continued, “but even so, it wouldn’t kill the YMCA to make some rules about this that are more strict. What comes around goes around.”

I asked her what she meant by ‘what comes around goes around’, but she avoided the question, instead adding: “People need to start showing some more respect around here or I’ll be working out at one of their other locations.”

 

Heterosexual Man Spotted at a Panera Bread

image.jpeg

(News) A heterosexual man was spotted eating lunch at a Panera Bread located in Tom’s River, New Jersey on Saturday.  Phil Darwell, of White Plains, New York,  stopped there with his family for lunch while on vacation.

Darwell works for New Jersey Transit, has been married for 17 years, and has two children, 16 and 9.

Unless Hiking Or On A School Campus, A Man Carrying A Backpack Is Always “Kinda Creepy”

image

(Research) Unless hiking, or on a school campus, a man carrying a backpack is always “kinda creepy”, according to a new independent study done by researchers at the Swiss Department Of Social Sciences. The research project, headed by department founder, Noah Rorschach, polled roughly 800 U.S, residents, both male and female, between the ages of 18 and 50. The study asked people to write down their first five thoughts when shown a short video of a man walking down a street carrying a backpack. Below are the five most frequently repeated responses:

5) “Probably a murderer.”

4) “What is he hiding?”

3) “Doesn’t he have a home?”

2) “He has drugs on him, for sure.”

1) “Kinda creepy.”

During the study, all participants were also shown two other photos: one of the same man with the same backpack walking on a college campus, and another of the same man hiking in the wilderness.

“Hey, totally different thing,” explained Rorschach, “I mean there’s nothing odd about a guy with a backpack in those two scenarios.”

The full report will be published next month, and can be viewed at http://www.sdss.gov/study/dosanddonts/bp